damn. started out nice but ended in the same old shit.

so ive led myself down a hole where there are painful things at the bottom

I've stopped something good
to try to get to something better (which hasn't come and will never occur)
and i realized that today....
so of course me being the retard that i am i try to go back to an original argee and DAMN if that back fired too

so now im alone(like i have been for the past few weeks but just thought it would all work out....damn if i was wrong)
and back to writing shitty, depressing blogs to try to get shit out of my mind.....(it doesnt work)
i like to think blogging helps me think but it just makes me think about the shit hole im in

this will prolly be one of the few blogs i write again untill something gets better
she'll prolly read this and ask why?
but for everyone else that have been reading my blogs for a while they know if its shitty i dont blog
because shit stays shitty for LONG periods of time............

eatting diner
smoking
and falling asleep are my main goals for a while........................